Oh, Snap! Smurfs Are REAL!
Dear Fellow Beings;
Ya know, any time I start to think it can’t get any stranger on this fair planet, the typical cracks in reality range wide to reveal its darker crags. For instance, there’s Paul Karason:
I mean, really. Sure, there’s a “scientific” explanation, but I am certain, just as sure as the rooster calls the dawn, that this man is a Smurf.
And, he’s not the only one. A Libertarian and former candidate for a senate seat in Montana, Stan Jones, is also a Blue Dude. Which means they’re trying to take over our government! This can’t happen! Not Here! Not Now!
I propose that police powers be expanded to include the right to stop and deport all non-beige, brown or yellow peoples. Further, our sons must be counseled to avoid personal or conjugally-initiated manipulation and involvement on the occasion of the Blue Moon so that these aberrations will not have access to our precious genetic material to be used to propagate their
Yours truly,
Gargamel